I don’t think I’ve known exactly what I’ve wanted since I was 12. Past that, everything I know about myself is a continual vague guess. For four years in college I thought I was going to be a doctor, plumbing the human body; then it was literature professor, plumbing the depths of the soul; since then, I’ve been a film and television critic, a music photographer and journalist, a documentary-maker for about two months, and a creative writer throughout all that time. I’m still no closer to knowing myself, but I am closer to understanding that that isn’t a terrible thing. I think I’m content now to watch myself unfold along with the rest of the world.
But I do have a few educated guesses about myself–I love photography, mostly film. I love the accident and process of film, and the way that taking a photo cuts it from its context, and reminds you how utterly strange things can look when they’re all by themselves. I came to need meditation and yoga, because changing careers that often doesn’t come without a need for peace and quiet. I’ve always felt a need for new music and still spend every morning looking for new sounds. I’ve always loved children’s literature and animation, because it always felt purer than adult culture in an archetypal sense. No one understands fear and joy better than a child.
There are advantages to being a stranger to yourself. To be unknown is to be unbounded, and that means I can go where I please, I can see and still be awed, I can listen to stories without bias, and try to understand with infinite compassion. I think that’s what’s necessary to be a great journalist, photographer, or storyteller, and that’s what I try to bring.
I’ll close with some miscellany:
I have a brown rabbit named John Cleese.
I’ve been in a nine-year relationship with a talented illustrator, and we’re going to write children’s literature together.
My favorite poet is William Blake
My favorite film is Night of the Living Dead
My favorite music genres are Noise Rock and Post-Punk
Here is PuttPutt Comics, where I work on children’s literature and comics.